Tag Archives: death

Now Couldn't Be the Right Time

It seems as if every time a dozen or so people are murdered and six or so dozen are shot up in a movie theater, high school or college campus, the wacko leftist peacenik liberal elites start spouting that anyone who believes automatic weapons should be legal is either stupid, crazy, a mass murderer wannabe or has length challenged privates, and that our right to bare arms and bear arms, which even that Obama-loving SCOTUS Judge Roberts, admits that we have, has limits and that we shouldn’t be able to carry at airports, high schools, day care centers, bars, church and places where the President will be.

All the while, those reasoned and highly compensated voices from the heartland are reminding us that this is not the time to reflect, but is the time to grieve, remember the victims and praise Jeezus that we were not in the theater that night. This is the time to watch and listen to cable and entertainment news so we can learn every salacious detail about the shooter, and every emotion felt and articulated by neighbors, teachers, employers, lovers, movie critics, Batman fans or childhood friends who hadn’t seen him in 20 years. This is the time to be reminded of why an insanity plea doesn’t make a murderer innocent.

 Houston Gun ShowThis is the time to come together and not discuss if it makes sense that anyone can order 6,000 rounds of ammo, body armor or hundred-round clips on the internets, tax free. There will be time to talk about unregulated gun shows. There will be time to remember the police killed in the line of duty by Americans exercising their rights and time to appreciate the irony that the men and women whose job it is to protect us have been forced to become more and more militarized to be safer from all of our guns. There will be time for old 60 Minutes reruns where they buy hundreds, or even thousands of guns right there on teevee with no questions asked. There will be time when we will all pay attention to the drone of the Muslim Brotherhood’s moles in Congress as they finally admit that they want to declare Sharia, take away our God given and constitutionally protected freedoms by denying us our right to protect our homes and loved ones from suspicious looking people wearing hoodies. There will be a time to compare our gun deaths with other civilized countries, Somalia, for instance.

There will be time to remember that guns don’t kill people. It is people who are the problem. Ironically, more than half of all gun deaths are not from people protecting themselves. More than half the gun deaths each year are from people killing themselves — often the spouse or child of the gun owner. Suicide, not homicide.

Now is not the time. We need more perspective. More dead. More wounded. No, now couldn’t possibly be the time. It is an election year and the NRA doesn’t lose elections.

According to news accounts, now might be the time to go to the local gun super store, or better yet, a gun show (favored by felons, gangs, terrorists and the mentally ill), and stock up on guns, ammo and the latest bulletproof fashions – perfect for date night. But if you are one of those special gun owners who just can’t seem to maintain a healthy relationship, consider skipping the movies this weekend. The Olympic shooting competition is starting.


An afterthought for your entertainment: “The Sing-Along Second Amendment” by Roy Zimmerman

Get Me Off The Road, Please

Driving on the interstates is inherently irrationalDriving on the interstates is inherently irrational. To think that the drivers of all those other cars would voluntarily and routinely entrust theirs and their family’s lives to me is nuts. Based solely on a ten minute driving test in high school, with no knowledge of  my driving skills, my car maintenance or my attention span, and regardless of whether I’m returning a call, Twittering, checking email, drinking coffee or booze, locating an iPod playlist, picking my nose, watching a DVD, lost or lost in thought, they have enough faith in me to share the highway at speeds guaranteed to to kill and maim. With my car aimed directly at theirs, they ride along fearlessly believing they are more likely to fall asleep from boredom than my minimum breaking distance. Why do they do it? What makes where they are going so important? Why do they trust me completely at 75 miles an hour, but while standing still they lock their doors? Beat’s me. My driving scares the bejesus out of me. It’s a miracle we make it safely any time I drive. I believe I need to be stopped. I’m hoping all those other drivers will organize and decide it is time to get me, and all the others like me, off the road. Trains come to mind. Trains that go places people, especially drivers like me, want to go. Modern, fast, clean, energy efficient trains. Spurs the economy. Creates jobs. And will save lives – maybe yours. Think about it. Then write your Congresspeople. Your life may depend it on it.

The perfect business plan

  1. Sell products that promise to solve life’s most feared problem: death.
  2. Acquire or force out all or most competitors in your market area.
  3. Make it unimaginably difficult, if not impossible, for a start-up business to compete with you.
  4. Spread regulation over 50 states so no one entity really regulates anything.
  5. Contribute hundreds of millions of dollars to campaigns of regulators at all levels of government including the courts and threaten each with loss of support in the next election.
  6. Promote privacy so no one knows what your service costs, what works, how well it works or how you do what you do.
  7. Gradually raise the price high enough that most consumers will be able to pay you for your service, but not have enough left to afford co-payments to use your service.
  8. Create a paper-based administrative system so complicated that it cannot possibly be audited.
  9. Deny payment of services for arbitrary reasons to routinely scare the hell out of your providers and their customers.
  10. Sell a product to those who don’t need it and tell them if they ever stop buying it and need it, they won’t be allowed to.
  11. Require every business to deduct the cost of your service from employee pay checks before they waste it on things like food or shelter.
  12. Require by law that all consumers buy your product or pay thousands of dollars in fines.
  13. Require government to pay for all consumers who cannot afford your product or choose not to purchase it.
  14. Play on the fears of the aged, the infirmed and the uninformed in your advertising.
  15. Play on the fears of the former middle class that government involvement will mean higher prices, higher taxes, and the services they worked so desperately to afford, will be diminished or rationed.
  16. Collude with providers to fix all prices and be the only source for payment of their services.
  17. Play Congress and the President by pretending to offer concessions on future price increases in return for a law to prevent government negotiation of prices.
  18. Stand ready with unlimited advertising budgets, corrupt industry experts and politicians, willing media partners and misinformation should any constituency turn on you.
  19. Gradually increase the pressure of your grip on society’s privates until the pain is so great we all fall on our knees and will do whatever they want.
  20. Don’t make or provide any useful function to society.

The NRA are a bunch of yellow (insert euphemism here)

nra_logoRaccoons? Beavers? Hedgehogs? Rabbits? Squirrels? Trees? Dogs? Children? Other campers? Aliens? Socialists? Terrorists? Park Rangers? Our President? Other NRA members? What are they afraid of?

Congress passed a bill that, at least nine months from now, will curtail just a few of the many grotesque abuses of the credit card industry. Your NRA, which has a budget of $150 million to $200 million, much of which they spend on bribing your elected leaders, got language stuck in the bill that will allow anyone (not just NRA members) to carry guns in national parks. Wussies — the NRA and everyone who voted to tack a silly gun measure on to a serious bill intended to address a real economic and consumer issue. Reprobates — everyone of them — including the 105 Democrats in the House and 27 Democrats in the Senate who pandered their support for the NRA measure.

Here’s the evidence (from a great read in the National Parks Traveler): 273 million people visited national parks in 2006. Sadly, there were 11 homicides*; two went off cliffs in relationship disputes; one, a suicide. another a DUI. One, a victim of a drunken fight. Another, a shooting death by someone with an illegal firearm. One a drowning. We do not know how the others died, but, like the NRA, I suspect it must have been attacks by raccoon, beaver or terrorists. One note: there were 37 times as many bears killed by humans than humans killed by bears. Oops, I got my math wrong: 37 bear deaths by human, human deaths by bear 0.

The same year, the number one crime in national parks was liquor law violations (5,752). Number two, was carrying a gun (1,950). Number three, intoxication (843). Seems to this outsider that if we allowed guns in the parks, the number one and number three crimes might become more serious. Of course, that is easy for me to say, I’ve never been attacked by a squirrel or a terrorist in a national park.

There may be another explanation: protecting poachers (aka: hunters who think they have a right to shoot anything, anywhere without fear of prosecution). Poaching is big business with an organized illegal safari going for upwards of $10,000 per poacher. The park service has few law enforcement rangers (one ranger for every 118,000 acres), but (according to Science World) they still catch about 5,000 poachers a year and estimate that they don’t catch another 150,000-200,000 a year. Since it would take an enormous amount of luck to catch a poacher in the act (“Ranger, we’re just on a nature hike”) most of those caught end up being prosecuted on gun violations. Poachers are big winners with this new legislation.

Why are we even talking about this? Anyone not at a cocktail party sponsored by the NRA would read the second amendment and understand that our founding fathers were protecting the right of the states to have militias and for those in the militias to bear arms (sorry, for the bears). No one, not even Democrats, have mentioned (I dare you to Google it) taking away the state militias’ rights to bear arms. After all, we need them to continue fighting Bush’s wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.

No. I must be missing something that Wyatt Earp (born in Kentucky, officially a Southerner) also overlooked when he and Wild Bill disarmed Dodge City. The right to commit suicide (on purpose or accidentally). The right to kill your spouse (on purpose or accidentally). The right to kill your children (on purpose or accidentally). The right to kill your friends (on purpose or accidentally). The right to protect yourself and your property while drinking. And the right to commit crimes with guns. We must protect these rights and quit trying to take the guns out of Charlton Heston’s cold dead hands.

Depending on whether you have basic cable, or the full spectrum, there were dozens of times as many police shootings on TV as actually happened — police actually shoot and kill about 200 criminals each year. During 2005 (the most recent year statistics have been released), gun owners, exercising their NRA-guaranteed right, shot and killed over 3,000 of their children, wounding ten times as many. In the same period, the rest of the world combined (not including our wars), didn’t add up to our domestic output.

Listen, I’m fine if Texas wants to spend what money they have left in their former governor’s economy on buying and hoarding guns (way up since Obama’s been in office). They are planning to secede anyway and I bet the Pentagon, or the Mexican drug cartel, can handle whatever they have in their gun cabinets. Just stay out of our parks, or we’ll sic a beaver on you.

____________

* Tom Coburn, (R-OK), and sponsor the NRA Amendment to the Senate bill states in his press release that the number of 2006 homicides our National Parks and the US Fish and Wildlife Service** public lands was 16, and also includes statistics for rape, robbery, kidnappings and assault. He cites the National Park Service and the Fish and Wildlife Service as his source, but they do not collect and publish such statistics. This information could only have come from the FBI’s Uniform Crime Reporting Program, though it beats the heck out me how it could have been compiled accurately from the data available.

**The US Fish and Wildlife Service manages more than 150 million acres, 550 national wildlife refuges and other units of the Refuge System, plus 37 wetland management districts – in all 50 states and many near metropolitan areas.

How your Southern Senators voted (Alphabetical by Senator Name): 29 Yay; 3 Nay; 2 Not Voting

Alexander (R-TN), Nay
Begich (D-AK), Yea
Bond (R-MO), Yea
Bunning (R-KY), Yea
Burr (R-NC), Yea
Byrd (D-WV), Yea
Cardin (D-MD), Nay
Chambliss (R-GA), Yea
Coburn (R-OK), Yea
Cochran (R-MS), Yea
Corker (R-TN), Yea
Cornyn (R-TX), Yea
DeMint (R-SC), Yea
Graham (R-SC), Yea
Hagan (D-NC), Yea
Hutchison (R-TX), Yea
Inhofe (R-OK), Yea
Isakson (R-GA), Yea
Landrieu (D-LA), Yea
Lincoln (D-AR), Yea
Martinez (R-FL), Yea
McCaskill (D-MO), Nay
McConnell (R-KY), Yea
Mikulski (D-MD), Not Voting
Murkowski (R-AK), Yea
Nelson (D-FL), Yea
Pryor (D-AR), Yea
Rockefeller (D-WV), Not Voting
Sessions (R-AL), Yea
Shelby (R-AL), Yea
Vitter (R-LA), Yea
Warner (D-VA), Yea
Webb (D-VA), Yea
Wicker (R-MS), Yea

Get Me Off The Road, Please

The best reason for mass transportation

Driving on the interstates is inherently irrational. To think that the drivers of all those other cars would voluntarily and routinely entrust theirs and their family’s lives to me is nuts. Based solely on a ten minute driving test in high school, with no knowledge of my driving skills, my car maintenance or my attention span, and regardless of whether I’m returning a call, Twittering, checking email, drinking coffee or booze, locating an iPod playlist, picking my nose, watching a DVD, lost or lost in thought, they have enough faith in me to share the highway at speeds guaranteed to to kill and maim. With my car aimed directly at theirs, they ride along fearlessly believing they are more likely to fall asleep from boredom than my minimum breaking distance. Why do they do it? What makes where they are going so important? Why do they trust me completely at 75 miles an hour, but while standing still they lock their doors? Beat’s me. My driving scares the bejesus out of me. It’s a miracle we make it safely any time I drive. I believe I need to be stopped. I’m hoping all those other drivers will organize and decide it is time to get me, and all the others like me, off the road. Trains come to mind. Trains that go places people, especially drivers like me, want to go. Modern, fast, clean, energy efficient trains. Spurs the economy. Creates jobs. And will save lives – maybe yours. Think about it. Then write your Congresspeople. Your life may depend it on it.